Nothing captures the truth

Nothing captures the truth of the image:
            the luminous quality
            of the center of the pitcher
            and the glass in the morning light,
     that particular color of off-white/cream/not-beige-lighter-than-beige/linen
the linen of the curtain draping
to the floor, the shading of the drape
that you learned how to evoke all those years ago in the classroom
in the early light with charcoal
the classroom with the geraniums struggling in their pot by the window,
the window and the rusty bannister that led to the roof
although no one ever went out there,
we were bent over our sheets of paper,
first with permanent marker so we learned how to draw a line with confidence
and then with the charcoal and the pastel
and the trip to the sideboard where the hairdryers lay waiting
for us to finish off our washes and dip
our watercolor brushes for the next thing,
the colors mixed
                painstaking
but never quite right

and your camera, your camera phone now,
none of it ever captures the truth of the scene you try to capture,
the cherry blossoms set to bloom but not yet, not yet,
the startle-surprise of the first green buds
under the still-lowering sky
and now weeks later, those same buds wafting out a scent
you think is cinnamon but no cardamom but no
         something familiar but certainly not of this place
and the yellow flowers multiplied you recognize now for jasmine
jasmine from the incense stick, the scent packed across mountains
and cities from trucks and forklifts,
packed powdered and tight in boxes within boxes,
bagged and bought and sold
and placed in a fireproof receptacle and lit
and here blooming before you at the end of someone's driveway,
someone who planted a garden they haven't had time to weed
nothing will capture it
                       or the swans gliding majestic
over the surface of the pond,
which itself changes every day
and no one can capture the way the sparkles glint in the light,
moving, like the swans, majestic,
oh they try yes they try but nothing
nothing captures it not even words

Frances Donovan
May 1, 2008

Vietnamese, Hungarians, and Zimbabweans all share this common story of a Pressing Ghost. Usually occurring when one awakes from sleep, is the sensation of limbs & legs going numb, heavy pressure felt near the chest region, and the helpless victims inability to move. The Hawaiians believed this to be the result of "Pule Ana 'ana," a sorcery chant that includes praying someone to death. Such conditions can also be medically explained as a delay in chemical release in the nervous system.